How to Deal with Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder

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Borderline personality disorder ( BPD) is a psychiatric condition that affects mood and behavior. His trademark is being overly sensitive when experiencing trivial things, then responding with extreme behaviors such as anger, hysterics, depression, and even a tendency to self-injure. So, how to deal with them?

This difficulty in controlling feelings or emotions causes them to be unable to function functionally, as well as difficulties in maintaining relationships with other people.

If you’ve been following the trial of Johnny Depp and his ex-wife, Amber Heard, there’s some news. A witness, Shannon Curry, who is a forensic psychologist employed by Johnny’s legal team, said that after a 12-hour interview and reviewing Amber’s mental health history, Shannon reached the conclusion that Amber had histrionic personality disorder and BPD.

Having a family member, partner, or friend with borderline personality disorder does require adjustment and patience. However, this is no reason for us to feel ashamed and cover up the truth. Those of us who don’t have mental health problems can be an encouragement and support for people with borderline personality disorder to keep fighting.

Citing the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) page, the emotional stability we have along with our ability to calm someone with borderline personality disorder has an important influence on that person’s recovery.

Then how can we help people with borderline personality disorder ? Check out the explanation of how to deal with someone with borderline personality disorder below.

1. Don’t be easily provoked by emotions

The first way to deal with someone with borderline personality disorder is to hold back emotions. If you have friends or family who suffer from borderline personality disorder , you must be able to balance the ups and downs of emotions shown by that person.

Based on information from the Borderline in the Act page , when someone with borderline personality disorder is angry, don’t be in a hurry to get emotional and get angry too. Instead, you need to calm down and listen to the outburst of annoyance that the person is throwing. Because, behind the angry or hysterical behavior, there is actually something that people with borderline personality disorder want to express .

By showing calm behavior, people with borderline personality disorder will know that you are listening and care about their condition.

2. Accompany during therapy schedule or control

Another characteristic shared by someone with borderline personality disorder is the fear of being left behind. Try to take the time to escort and/or accompany him during therapy or consultation with a psychiatrist.

If we are unable to attend, we can inform you that we will arrive late or maybe we can only accompany you for a while. By telling this, we also inform the psychiatrist so that later during therapy or consultation the psychiatrist can also clarify.

The attitude of rushing to avoid being accompanied or not caring will result in someone with borderline personality disorder being misunderstood and then entering a cycle of emotional turmoil , such as feeling isolated, sad, and then blaming yourself.

NAMI also mentions that someone with borderline personality disorder can even tend to self-harm because of this misunderstanding. They are less able to understand the concept that not being able to do something doesn’t mean they don’t love or care.

3. Involve friends or co-workers to get to know BPD more deeply

As family members or friends of someone with borderline personality disorder , we certainly know more about this mental condition. However, people who are not familiar with borderline personality disorder can misinterpret the behavior of people with borderline personality disorder , especially if they are in an unstable condition.

To prevent bullying , we can invite friends or co-workers to join webinars , discussions, or read brochures or other sources about borderline personality disorder . This activity is called psychoeducation .

By knowing the difficulties experienced by someone with borderline personality disorder , they can reduce the chances of emotional turmoil in people with borderline personality disorder .

Based on the book Practice Guideline for the Treatment of Patients with Borderline Personality Disorder , experts also mention that participation in psychoeducational groups has a positive impact on patients and families.

4. Understand the difficulties but still set limits

The next way to deal with someone with borderline personality disorder is to understand their difficulties and provide advice. Listening and understanding the difficulties faced by someone with borderline personality disorder does not mean we immediately agree to everything or let them behave as they please.

Launching Psychology Today , Imi Lo, a psychotherapist, gives an example of how we can set boundaries for someone with borderline personality disorder :

Through sentences like that, we show concern as well as tell which behavior is good.

The American Psychiatric Association also emphasizes the importance of setting limits on which behaviors are tolerable or not, in an effort to protect our feelings from being hurt.

Launching Behavioral Health Florida , another example of a rule we can give someone with borderline personality disorder is to:

Stay away from conversation if someone with borderline personality disorder starts cursing or speaking harshly.
Informing from the start that does not receive calls at bedtime.

5. Inviting people with BPD to stay active in maintaining health

In addition to regularly attending therapy and consultations, we also need to remind people who have borderline personality disorder to get used to a healthy life such as exercising, adopting a balanced nutritious diet, and doing activities that have a relaxing effect.

Launching Verywell Mind , by maintaining mental and physical health, someone who has borderline personality disorder can reduce unstable emotions.

Those are some ways to deal with someone with borderline personality disorder . Although interacting with people with borderline personality disorder is often difficult, with patience and knowing the triggers of the anger, we can help them to become better, so that they can be active in the community.